You started your relationship like two peas in a pod. You couldn't get enough of one another, dreamily gazed into each other's eyes, and cuddled with limbs entwined. Ah such young bliss.
Then baby makes three and it can feel like your bundle of joy gets positioned right smack in between the two of you (along with all their toys, the million (totally necessary) pieces of baby equipment, and of course the eventual tantrums).
You're on one side and your partner is getting farther and farther away on the other side. The gulf gets larger and larger. Before you know it there's a huge cavernous ravine between the two of you that's filled with all the requirements of raising kids today.
You love the little nugget, obviously, but you miss your partner.
Well luckily it doesn't have to be that way.
How do you reconnect when there's a screaming baby (or a few) that needs time, attention, and the coordination of a military drill team to raise? Well, you take a time out, that's what you do!
As a psychotherapist and new mom myself, I was so relieved to find the Gottman's training for new parents. I became a certified Bringing Baby Home Educator and gained so much for my own marriage and in raising my kids. The Bringing Baby Home workshop is great for expecting parents, but it's also for parents with young kids. Sure, it would have been nice to have prepared your relationship before you had your baby, but it's never too late to get back on track. Over the course of two days in the BBH workshop you'll spend some real, legit, one-on-one time with your partner (you know, like when you were the peas in the pod?). That in itself can be so helpful. Just committing to the course and saying that this is something that is important to you both is a super important step in strengthening your relationship.
Within the actual course you'll learn about love languages. How to fight and reconnect in a healthy way, and how to ask so you'll actually get your needs met. There's a whole section on reclaiming romance and intimacy. It will give you the tools to bridge the gulf (and climb over all the toys) to reconnect with one another.
During the BBH workshop you'll spend some time really planning how you want to raise your young family. What do you think about discipline? How old should the kids be before they date? What traditions do you want to continue from each of your families? What mistakes do you want to avoid? These are questions every couple should ask themselves in order to parent with intentionality and raise their kids the way they choose to, not just with moment by moment reactions.
You know you can't have these important conversations while your toddler is
throwing yogurt across the room. You need a time-out. Time to reconnect, strengthen your bond, get back on track, and plan your family's course with love. If you're ready for that, find a Bringing Baby Home workshop near you. Or if you're in the Central Arkansas area sign up for a workshop at the Studio, they're offered the first weekend of every month!